“Arrow” Recap: Mommy Dearest

Previously on Arrow…

 

His name is Oliver Queen, and he’s just the sexiest damn sociopath you’ll never want to meet in a dark alley. For five years, he was marooned on Magical Ninja island where he was trained to be a ruthless, righteous servant of arrow-slinging justice.

After his return home to Starling City, Oliver took on the guise of a hooded vigilante known to police as The Hood. He’s been having a grand old time, murdering thugs and making the lives of the rich and evil miserable. His father gave him this List of Doom, and everyone on it has crimes to pay for.

This episode starts off with Julian Sark getting out of prison, which means Sydney had better be careful. Okay, no, it’s not Sark. And yes, the inestimable David Anders has played several awesome roles since Alias—like Dr. Whale on Once Upon A Time. But he will always be Julian Sark to me—sexy, wonderful, bastardly genius spy.

Anyway, Sark Cyrus Vanch (is anyone named Cyrus not a psychopath?) pays his lawyer a visit. And he’s all “hey, you kind of let me go to jail, and that’s not what I paid you for” and the lawyer is all “Yeah, I had other stuff going on” and Cyrus is like, “Yeah, I get that. Hey, I just totally killed you!”

 

David always gives such good evil.

At the Arrow Cave, Diggle and Oliver are having a little chat about last week’s startling plot twist—the gift of a fresh copy of the List of Doom that came from Walter via Felicity Smoak. Digg is of the mind that since Walter allegedly got it from Moira that maybe Mommy Dearest is in the muck too.

Oliver is not happy with that accusation. “Dude, she’s my mom. Moms aren’t like that.”

Digg is somehow not swayed by this rock-solid defense. He suggests that since Moira is still chilling at home and Walter has gone missing, the bad seed here just might be mom and not step-dad.

Oliver is like, “Well, you’re mean. I’m going to ignore you and have a flashback now.”

 

And we travel back to the halcyon days of Magical Ninja Island. After having narrowly escaped the clutches of the evil Commando Army who seem to be in charge on MNI, Oliver heads to a place marked on his map by Yao Fei. Because the guy who turned on you and now works for the enemy and then used an ancient Chinese Vulcan death pinch on you is totally the guy you want to put your faith in.

Anyway, Oliver’s destination turns out to be the wreckage of a plane that, thankfully, is not Oceanic Airlines Flight 815. Though I am sure there is already a burgeoning crossover fandom between >Lost and >Arrow.

Inside, Oliver encounters yet another friendly island resident, played by Manu Bennett. And, well, whoever the casting director is for this show, it seems they have a type. A type I like.

Oliver’s newest playmate is going to totally kill him until Oliver mentions Yao Fei. That saves his life and merits a few intensely seductive looks from the guy pointing a sword at him. The show then tastefully cuts to another scene. They’re keeping things PG folks!

But moving to a scene with my least favorite character on the show, Inept Inspector Lance, is not just a splash of cold water. It’s like getting a swirly in a truck stop toilet. Ugh, I hate this character. I’ve long since given up any hope for redemption with him.

By contrast, his scene mate instantly becomes my favorite cop on the show. Lieutenant Frank is Lance’s superior and he has this nutty idea that Lance should focus on some police matters and not his own personal crusade.

 

Lance whines and insists he is just about to nail The Hood, to which Frank replies that he doesn’t really care. The Hood is doing all these really good things, so maybe he can take a spot lower down on Starling City’s most wanted.

Of course, Lance will not put aside his vendetta. And now I hate him even more. I was hoping there was maybe some pressure from higher up, pushing him to go after The Hood. But no, it’s just Lance and his petty “only the cops get to mete out justice” obsession. He even spouts some self-righteous crap about how he doesn’t want to live in a city where The Hood is considered a hero.

Ugh.

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