Morning Meme: Barbra To Perform At Grammy Awards, NPH Joins Muppet Movie, and Kylie Rehearses With Shirtless Dancers

Modern Family has
a plotline coming up that has Cameron taking over the music program at the kid’s
school so he can introduce them to the greats, “like Bernstein and Sondheim.”
But the most interesting thing in the article is that I have a
legitimate reason to keep talking about the Muppet movie: Rico Rodriguez,
Whoopi Goldberg, and the ubiquitous Neil Patrick Harris will be manning the
phones at a telethon the Muppets throw.

Britney Spears has delayed release of Femme
Fatale
from March 15th to March 29th.

Celebrity photo agency WENN has signed an agreement with
Twitter image service Plixi to
sell any and all celebrity photos posted on the service
. The license to do
so is in the Terms of Service no one reads when you sign up for Plixi, and the
celebrity does not get a cut of the money. WENN intends to go back and charge
magazines and websites retroactively for any images used. The only way a
celebrity can opt out is to remove their images from the service completely. So
much for using Twitter to connect with fans.

A sample of yogurt provided to a New Mexico woman tasted like semen according to her. Lab tests confirmed the
presence, and now the clerk is being tested to see if it’s his DNA and if he
had any diseases the woman needs to be aware of.

How I Met Your Mother’s Cobie
Smulders
has been confirmed as S.H.I.E.L.D Agent Maria Hill in The
Avengers
. Now if she can just snag Neil
Patrick Harris
a cameo.

In case you were still wondering which ballgame Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
attended that Cameron caught the foul ball at, the mystery has been solved.

X-Men bombshell Famke
Janssen
has signed on to play the villain in Hansel & Gretel.

But Julia Roberts
is going to play against type as the Evil Queen in one of the Snow
White
adaptations currently getting underway.

Japan is going to clean up space. They have a plan to launch a giant
metal fishing net into space to scoop up debris before it burns up on reentry.

Eight of the top ten most watched television broadcasts in history were
Super Bowls, topped by this year.

Sure the Super Bowl was one of the most excessive displays
of wealth ever witnessed. Heck, the Navy spent $450,000 to do a flyover of a domed
stadium with the roof closed. But it was worth it, right?

Keith Olbermann has confirmed he’ll be anchoring a nightly news and opinion
show on Current TV.

The cast of Glee is going to have a 16-city U.S. tour this summer, which beats
the devil out of the three city tours of the past. But they still don’t get
within five hours of me.

Barbra Streisand
is making a rare live performance at this year’s Grammy
Awards.

The New York Times hated Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark. USA Today
loved it
. That explains the 
media landscape better than anything I’ve ever heard.

Newman has joined Torchwood: Miracle Day.

The Catholic Church has indicated approval for a new iPhone app for confessional. Just check off your sins
as you make them, and it provides guidance. But I’m worried because my iPhone
only has 32GB storage.

The Navy has
released a timeline of June 30th
to complete their training for
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell repeal implementation.

Lindsay Lohan will be formally charged with felony grand theft for the
necklace she says she borrowed. With her outstanding probation, she could face
three years in jail if found guilty.

Ithacapella and Premium Blend have released a version of “Firework” with proceeds going
to benefit The Trevor Project.

Speaking of good works, celebrity photographer Mike Ruiz has a new line of t-shirts
with his fine body, RuPaul, and
others, with part of the proceeds benefiting Ali Forney.

Los Angeles and Getty Foundation have purchased over 2,000 Mapplethorpe works and plan
scholar access and large exhibitions.

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