“Shameless” Recap: “It’s Only Homophobia If They’re Afraid of You”

The episode begins with Jimmy (Justin Chatwin) contemplating a cockroach on his toothbrush.

It all kind of goes downhill from there.

Fiona (Emmy Rossum) asks Jimmy for advice on her outfit, and he asks if she’s going in for an office job or a coke orgy. What, there’s a difference? She clearly isn’t temping at AfterElton! [rimshot]

Meanwhile, Frank (William H. Macy) is settling in nicely at the home of Christopher Dahmer, the John Wayne Bates of the Greater Chicagoland area. Christopher is the kind of guy who laughs out loud at Garfield: “He’s always so hungry!” He’s also the kind of guy who has a taxidermied dog in his breakfast nook, serves an alcoholic a Bloody Mary at breakfast, and is probably keeping about a dozen tween corpses in his crawlspace. Just sayin’.

Still, when Frank goes off on how they are basically living as a same-sex couple, Chris Bundy is savvy enough to point out that “They get offended if you call them queers, Frank,” and dotes on the Lady Gallagher when Frank mentions that he thinks he might have gout, “The King’s Disease”. (Is he talking about Elvis?)

Back at the homestead, we learn that Lip (Jeremy Allen White) hates Facebook, and that Mandy (Emma Greenwell) thinks that he should unfriend Karen for being a skank.

Down the block, V (Shanola Hampton) and Kev (Steve Howey) are embroiled in a discussion of whether or not they should get their imaginary, nonexistent child – who is of nonexistent, undetermined gender – circumcised. Fiona asks if men get PMS and V says, “We get weepy, they get angry.” Kevin says it’s because of all the cheese, or something, and Fiona suggests that they get their imaginary kid snipped if they want him to “get his share of head.” The girl has a point. But did they really just bring up cheese in a conversation about circumcision?

Meanwhile, Debs (Emma Kenney) brings Wee Liam over to Sheila’s – she’s apparently supposed to babysit him. But Sheila (Joan Cusack) is bombed out on the plastic-wrapped sofa, no doubt still smarting from the return of the misery bomb that is her daughter, Karen, who engineered the Wongs’ removal of Baby Himey. Sure enough, Hurricane “Whore” Tattoo sweeps through on the way to school and Debs offer to make Sheila breakfast. I offer to make Sheila hot, wet tears, and she takes me up on the offer.

At the Coffee Meanery, Jimmy gets crap from a douchebag customer and starts to think that maybe working for a living kind of sucks. WELCOME TO THE RAT RACE, CANDY ASS.

At school, Karen (Laura Slade Wiggins) passes Mandy and Lip and Mandy hisses, “Walk the f*ck away.” She also mentions offhand to Ian (Cameron Monaghan) that Mickey is getting married to some girl he got pregnant. What the WHAT?!

At her temp assignment, a slightly hobbitish but very friendly lady named Connie shows Fiona the ropes, which include free donuts. (Holla!) Fiona is telemarketing and the only thing she needs to do is stick to a script… which is of course the only thing that Fiona can NOT do.

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