The episode kicks off with a close-up of a woman sticking her tongue into another woman’s ear. No, this isn’t The L Word, another Showtime pulse-raiser from years past – and the ear in question belongs to the heretofore hetero Fiona Gallagher (Emmy Rossum).
Emmy Rossum and Amy Smart
Turns out it’s just trashy coke-Hoover Jasmine (Amy Smart) waking Fi up to invite her to party on a boat, which seems a very non-Chicago thing to me, but whatever. We learn that summer is almost over, school starts next week, and Fiona was fully prepared to stick her thumb up the butt of whoever was giving her the Wet Willy treatment. She’s a keeper, fellas!
In the hall Fi runs into Frank (William H. Macy), who has become Gran’s full-time nurse/whipping-boy since she moved into the house. For some reason he’s not enjoying the post. Maybe it has something to do with the rather alarming-looking enema kit he has thrown over his shoulder?
We catch up with Kev (Steve Howey) and Veronica (Shanola Hampton) at the dog pound, where they are trying to pick out a dog to fill the space left by runwaway Ethel. V finds a pup she likes, remarking to Kev that “his tongue is almost as good as yours.” (Another keeper!) He insists that no dog – or cat, even – can take Ethel’s place, but then stops at one cage and resolvedly mutters, “Fine – we’ll take that.” Any bets on what kind of animal it is?
Karen (Laura Wiggins) enters her bedroom to find that Jody (Zack McGowan) has awoken with massive morningwood. Karen doesn’t look particularly happy to see his forest for the rather impressive tree, and is even less excited by Jody’s choice of boot-knocking music: Seal’s “Kiss From a Rose”. As he climaxes, Jody grunts, “My power, my pleasure, my pain!” and then he rolls off of her and cries, which he apparently always does after sex. Karen thinks “this is so gay.” Uh, memo to Karen – the only time this gay has cried after sex is when he has then discovered that there are no more Butterscotch Krimpets left in the pantry.
William H. Macy (hello, arms!), Louise Fletcher and Rossum
Gran (Louise Fletcher) wants to go to Indian Bingo, but Frank doesn’t want to take her. They argue about it as Frank gives her a bath, and Lip (Jeremy Allen White) comes in to take a leak – which he goes ahead and does in front of them, giving them the perfect opportunity to make fun of his “pecker”.
Out in the hall, Carl (Ethan Cutowsky) – clearly needing something constructive to do – realizes that he’s never tried sliding down the laundry chute and does just that, resulting in a painful fall onto the kitchen floor, interrupting Fiona, who is lecturing Ian (Cameron Monaghan) and Lip yet again about how they have to bury whatever hatchet is between them. Seriously, I’m starting to feel like Violet from American Horror Story when she kept on trying to leave the house but couldn’t, because I feel like I’ve seen this conversation every week for the last month at least. Back at the Jacksons’, Jody has invited his friends from tattoo school over to give him and Karen baby tips. Okay, this is gonna be good.
Cameron Monaghan, Jeremy Allen White, and Ethan Cutowsky
Turns out Kev and V adopted a bunny, which Kev names Ethel Number Two – it’s probably meant as a tribute to their runaway foster Mormon but it sounds more like something that said runaway might have left in the toilet. V tries to get frisky with Kev but he loses the mood when he spots one of Ethel’s magical undergarments hanging in the laundry room. He storms out, with V calling after him, “We can do Lady and the Tramp if you want!” I’m wondering if that involves dog costumes. Or spaghetti. Or both?
Steve (Justin Chatwin) drops by to talk to Fiona, but she gives him the bum’s rush.