So You Think You Can Dance‘s tenth season concluded last night in a predictable blitz of extraordinary talent, shocking versatility, and Mary Murphy‘s horny yelping, and thankfully, it won’t be the last kickass finale we ever see: Czar Lythgoe announced that the show had been picked up for an 11th season, which was not a certainty until roughly 8:05 p.m. last night. Yay! Hot men oiled up in the name of Bollywood choreography and Jesse Tyler Ferguson‘s leering commentary. Thank God (read: Paula Abdul‘s gilded neckpiece) for this.
We’ll get to the winners in a moment, but first, a quick run-down of the revisited routines that dominated the 2+ hour telecast.
“Edge of Glory”: Paul and Makenzie Were Apparently Born This Way
Aw, lovely. Too bad I still don’t need to hear “Edge of Glory” anymore. Guys, Born This Way was not a fun album. ARTPOP seems like a fun album, “Applause” is great and the gays are turning on Gaga at a critical moment. What is this injustice? You’re going to hear me roar and stay pressed re: this.
Jasmine Harper with Marco: Thicke As Thieves
I almost included this in my five favorite routines of the season, but I’d chosen two other flawless Jasmine numbers already, so forgive me. Here, Jasmine and Marco donned Janelle Monae outfits and kicked around some Bugs Bunny vaudeville. Where was the seltzer water? “Blurred Lines” was a part of it too, and I’ll be damned, that song has a way of surviving massive overplay and still tickling your douchey dance core. I know you (don’t) want it, but it beats on.
Fik-Shun and tWitch: Going Hard, Landing Soft
Fik and tWitch should do their own nationwide tour and forget about these tap-dancing lightweights in the wings. They’re such a dominating force as a duo that I sort of wish they’d do college gigs like Fran Lebowitz and Frank Rich. They’re harsh and in your face but very palatable. Plus, Fik-Shun is kind of tiny and I imagine he could fit inside one of tWitch’s pant legs. Imagine the stagewear possibilities!
Alexis, Aaron, and Curtis: Tapped Out?
OK, congrats to these tappers for getting another chance to click their heels and go Gregory Hines on our ass, but we have to acknowledge that something is inherently hilarious about tap-dancing. Because you’re never just looking at a tap dancer’s fancy footwork; you’re also forced to ogle his goofy facial expression. And it is ALWAYS GOOFY. The look on Aaron’s face while he’s tapping (marvelously) is “Oh! Hey, hey! Wouldja look at this? Hunh! Cool, right?” And he’s not really right by that point.