Dancing With the Stars has never been my bag, but the reality juggernaut boasts three big perks: 1) Tom Bergeron is and always has been an exceptional host, and it’s nice to see the veteran of Hollywood Squares and the cult FX talk show Breakfast Time helm a hit series with Emmy-winning flair; 2) Carrie Ann Inaba is a great judge; 3) Excepting So You Think You Can Dance, Dancing With the Stars has given us the hottest men in reality TV history. The constant shirtlessness is a big help.
Since the show just wrapped its all-star season with an all-female Final 3, let’s reorient ourselves with a look back at the movers and shakers we care most about: the sweaty, sweaty dudes.
10. Evan Lysacek
Figure skater Lysacek jumped from his gold medal-winning streak in Vancouver to Dancing With the Stars in record speed, and thank God: He was a sexy mover! He also had no chance against the truly spellbinding Nicole Scherzinger, but he gave us plenty of the hip swagger that helps make the Winter Olympics an erotic experience for everyone. And just between us, the glassy aloofness in his eyes is pure Anthony Perkins.
9. Helio Castroneves
The winsome winner of season five may not have fared so well in the current all-star season, but his gigantic grin and apparent passion made for eminently watchable hoofing. Auto racers shouldn’t be this sexy, everyone! But when you’re from Brazil and an athlete, it’s illegal not to be drop-dead hot. I understand his decision to remain scorching.