“The Vampire Diaries” 321: “Dry Spell”

We open this week’s episode the morning after last episode’s devastating events. A montage of shots of history textbooks and Civil War photographs ends with VamPric in his classroom, fondling his super-stake. Sadly, not a euphemism.

Caroline is at the high school, on the phone with Tyler, who has to pack up Klaus‘s house. He’s pretending to be sire-bound, leaving him vulnerable to this penultimate test; just pray Klaus doesn’t ask him to drive him to the airport. Someone is zipping around the school.

Caroline meets up with Rebekah for cleanup duty. They briefly bond over dead authority figures; Rebekah’s mother, Caroline’s history teacher. Rebekah heads for the gym to start cleanup and is attacked by VamPric, Caroline intercedes and they impale VamPric with the super-stake. Somehow he’s super-stake proof. He pulls the super-stake out but Rebekah and Caroline have zipped away.

Outside, Caroline struggles with her car keys. Just keep zipping, girl! VamPric catches up to her and snaps her neck. Steaming under the sun, drags Caroline inside. So the creation spell renders him immune to one of the weaknesses, the White Oak, but not the sun? And poor foresight on the part of Mama Witch, not spelling up a daylight ring for VamPric. Although perhaps the transition has to be complete before a daylight ring can be made. Rebekah observes, unnoticed.

Jeremy and Elena are painting Ric’s room. Stefan drops by to check up on them. He offers to help and Jeremy suggests the best way to help is asks for one day without vampires. He stalks out. Stefan and Elena make a little awkward small talk cut mercifully short by the doorbell. Stefan goes to answer. It’s Damon, escorting the bitten Bonnie. “We have a problem.”

Rebekah tells Klaus about VamPric. Klaus plans to collect Elena and leave town. Rebekah protests that he doesn’t need any more “stupid hybrids” but Klaus insists he needs protection from Mama Witch‘s continuing machinations. Rebekah tries to convince him that they can protect each other but Klaus is unconvinced. Rebekah leaves without him, calling Tyler “sire boy”. Snerk.

Damon and Bonnie are playing the recrimination game in the Gilbert kitchen, with Damon blaming Bonnie for feeding VamPric and Bonnie asserting a “the witches made me do it” defense. She asserts that there’s always a way to undo a spell, even the spell that created VamPric, but she doesn’t know what that counter-spell is.

Upstairs, Elena gets a call on her product-placed phone. The caller ID reads “Alaric”. She answers, not the least amused at what she assumes is a prank call. It’s VamPric. He tells her he has Caroline and orders her to the school. If she tells anyone where she’s going, everybody dies.

Downstairs, the doorbell rings. Jeremy opens up to find Klaus on his doorstep. He wants an invitation. Stefan and Damon order him upstairs and get into a staredown with Klaus. “Poor lad. Loses one questionable father figure only to have him replaced with the likes of you two.” Klaus wants them to send Elena out to play. They of course refuse and shut the door in his face. As they try to locate Elena inside, Klaus stalks around outside. He picks up a newspaper off the porch and hurls it through the front window, shattering it.

Elena arrives at the high school and heads for VamPric’s classroom. She spots him sitting at his desk and Bonnie gagged and pinned through her hands to a student desk with pencils. Elena demands that VamPric free Caroline and he says to free her herself. Elena starts working the pencils out of Caroline’s hands until VamPric slams them down again hard. Elena cries that he said he would release Caroline. “How many times do I have to tell you, Elena? Stop trusting vampires!”

Klaus is still stuck outside the Gilbert house and yells to those gathered inside, “I think you’re going to want to let me in!” I kinda think they’re not. He looks around the neighborhood and his eyes rest on a neighbor’s picket fence and a soccer ball.

As those gathered inside notice Elena’s car is gone, the soccer ball crashes through the front door. From the porch, Klaus hurls pickets at the assemblage. “Missed me!” taunts Damon, although sadly he omits the traditional “now you gotta kiss me”. Damon launches one back and Klaus hurls another and lines up his third shot. In the midst of all of this chaos Stefan’s cell phone rings and he actually answers it! People really are slaves to their cell phones, aren’t they? It’s VamPric.

Klaus marches back onto the porch with a propane tank in one hand and a flaming newspaper gripped in the other. It’s like a Road Runner cartoon. Next up an Acme Giant Slingshot. Stefan meets him at the door and tells him to put it out. Klaus dares him to step outside. He does, explaining that VamPric has Elena and Caroline and will kill them both if Klaus doesn’t surrender.

Klaus suspects Stefan is leading him into a death trap. Stefan reminds him that if Klaus dies the chances are one in four that Stefan and the rest will die (Damon: “I’ll take those odds.”) and a 100% chance that Tyler will die (Damon: “Good with that too.”). Stefan suggests they formulate a plan to rescue the hostages.

Klaus suggests Damon distract VamPric while Stefan sneaks Elena out. Damon objects on the grounds of likelihood of instant death. Stefan wonders why Klaus suddenly seems so willing to leave Caroline to die but before they can get too much into that Bonnie offers an idea. She can do the desiccation spell that her mother Abby used on Mikael. Except she doesn’t know the spell. And she has also apparently forgotten that doing that spell permanently drained Abby’s powers. Klaus notes they have eight hours until sunset, at which time Elena’s dead, Klaus is out the door and the rest are on their own against the super-slayer.

Back at the high school, VamPric is soaking Caroline’s gag in vervain. He replaces it, causing Caroline to cry out in pain as the vervain acts like “inhaling razor blades with every breath”. Although being dead usually means not having to breathe. Regardless, her lips and cheeks begin to blister.

Elena demands to know why VamPric is torturing Caroline. He says it’s to make it easier for Elena to end Caroline’s suffering by staking her. Elena protests that this isn’t what she wants but VamPric insists that it is, pointing out all the hours she’s spent training and getting stronger. He says she could be a great vampire hunter but she’s never staked a vampire.

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