“The Vampire Diaries” Season Finale – Graduation Day

In which a bunch of kids who never go to class graduate high school, plus vampires and dead guys

The stage is decorated, the chairs are set up, the diploma covers are in bloom as Mystic Falls High School Class of 2011 prepares to graduate. As scattered figures cross the football field (stay classy, MFHS!) Kol takes to the mic. He rants about the supernatural massacres that the so-called good guys perpetrated for their selfish ends. The products of those massacres, the twelve redshirt hybrids and the twelve dead witches, have gathered to finish unleashing hell on Earth. Title card!

As Bon Jovi’s “Shot Through the Heart” (nice callback) blares through the halls of Casa Salvatore, Lexi dances and Stefan drinks.

Damon enters and kills the music. Stefan sarcastically re-introduces him to Lexi, whom he no doubt remembers from shagging her in the 1970s and killing her in season one. She zoops up and throttles Damon a bit before assuring him that any time she has left she won’t be wasting on the likes of him.

Damon acknowledges this and reminds them that Lexi’s continued presence means that something has gone wrong with the re-installment of the veil between here and The Other Side. Stefan reacts with mock horror at his own self-centeredness, celebrating a few precious moments with his dead best friend instead of saving the world. “I should be upstairs, grooming my hero hair!” Damon demands to know if Stefan is drunk. Stefan: “I dunno Mom, am I?” I love snarky Stefan, can he play all next season? Damon wonders what went wrong.

Cut to what went wrong, as Bonnie tells Caroline on the phone that she “hit a snag” in re-raising the veil. Is that a ghostly cell phone or did Bonnie rob her own corpse? Caroline replies that a bad yearbook picture is a “snag”. This is a “tsunami”. Oh Caroline, it’s only been a couple of months since that killer wave hit Japan. Too soon, girl. Caroline objects to graduating in the middle of a “ghost-filled Expression triangle” which leads Bonnie to cast a despairing glance back at her rapidly cooling self. She suggests canceling since she’ll have to wait until the full moon rises to tap the power she needs to finish tidying up. Caroline practically howls with outrage at the thought of canceling and makes Bonnie swear that this will be a “friend day”.

Bonnie hangs up and Grams tells her to go on. She’ll make sure no one finds her body but Bonnie has to…Bonnie cuts her off, saying she’ll tell them but doesn’t know how. Grams means no, be sure to say your goodbyes.

Elena, Jeremy and Alaric are having a picnic at Jeremy’s grave and the boys are tearing into their burgers like there’s no tomorrow.

Oh.

And yeah, stuffing my face and tossing back a few drinks (which they are also doing) would be two of the three things I’d do one last time in their situation. Jeremy reaches for the bottle but Elena keeps it away, marking the only time in four seasons that a minor has been denied a drink.

They’re having a wonderful time and I’m so happy to have the three of them together one more time but the mood turns somber when Elena starts to tear up. Jeremy reminds her of the no tears rule since they have so little time. Elena assures him that the crying is happy crying since it means her emotion chip is fully functioning.

Her cell phone rings, breaking the happy mood. Let it go to voice mail, Elena! It’s the Grill so she figures it’s Matt. It’s not Matt. It’s Connor, the Hunter she killed in self-defense in an earlier episode. Elena makes her worried face.

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