“True Blood”: “They Call Me a Danger Whore.”


This week’s True Blood brought us a body count, several new vampires, and a moment of keen self-awareness from Sookie in the midst of her doing something completely ridiculous. Let’s dig in.

Beel (Stephen Moyer) hears Sookie (Anna Paquin) screaming underwater and suddenly Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) is thrown into the nearest swamp tree – it’s Barlow (Rob Kazinsky) who has come to her rescue. She tells him to zap her daddy out of Lala, which he does, and she tells Lala, “Tell him to get the f*ck outta my life… forever.” Which he does (until the next time they need a plot device in a flannel). That’s our girl – from drowning to bossypants in 0.6 seconds.


Eric (Alexander Skarsgard) – whose shirt announces that he is #1, btw – faces off against Pam (Kristin Bauer van Straten) but neither moves. An impatient Sarah Newlin (Anna Camp) mews, “You assured me this would be violent.” Wait – Pam can fly, too? Sure enough, she and Eric both fly, and they kill the snipers and stake a dude right through the “Open Your Heart” peepshow-viewing glass. Eric spies Steve Newlin (Michael McMillan) through the gloryhole, which I’m sure isn’t a first for Steve.

Lala, meanwhile, isn’t feeling the fact that Ben is a vamp who can walk in the sun. But suddenly Beel summons Barlow, who promptly pukes. Sookie grabs his hand and whisks him off to the graveyard with the chandeliers that her dead cousin used to take her to.

Beel – confused as to how his progeny could resist his summons – looks for Jess, and realizes that she isn’t there and is probably in some death camp. He says something vaguely ominous  and tries another tactic: “Lilith?”

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